Two women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are comparing stories on how they died.
1st woman: I froze to death.
2nd woman: How horrible!
1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?
2nd woman: I died of a massive hearth attack. I suspected my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him
all by himself in the den watching TV.
1st woman: So what happened?
2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I
started runing all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under
all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died!
1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer. We'd both still be alive!
[size=10]Manny Ramirez....$20 million
Pedro Martinez....$17.5 million
Curt Schilling...$12 million (and a $2 million bonus)
Never hearing a Yankee fan chant 1918 again...priceless. [/size]