Wow, this is early. I mean a few days ago, we had Summerslam. Now, we're already on the road to Wrestlemania. But if you insist
ECW Championship: Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu
2 out of 3 Falls Match: Kurt Angle vs. C.M. Punk
Ideally, I would want Samoa Joe taking on Angle, but he's a TNA star and should remain an indie. I'd hate to see what WWE would do to him.
Now these aren't necessarily predictions, but this is Vinnie Mac's ring and we just live in it. Here's what the most dominant man in sports entertainment would want:
Old Fart's Fatal Four-Way Deathmatch: Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair vs. Terry Funk vs. Hulk Hogan
It will be as comical as the 2001 Gimmick Battle Royale of Wrestlemania 17. Promise.
Money in the Bank: Big Show, Mark Henry, Great Khali, Undertaker, Kane, Sylvester Terkay, and what the heck Kevin Nash!
Everyone loves a ladder match with big dominant hosses in Vince McMahon's crazy world.
DX vs. Vince, Shane O'Mac, Spirit Squad, Umaga, Finlay, Regal, Mr. Kennedy, Tatanka, Brooklyn Brawler, The Goon, Max Moon, Gobbly Gooker, and Barry Horowitz
Yup, for the umpteenth time, we have another Vince/DX angle (Lord, please let this be the blowoff match we've been waiting for!). Vince finally snaps and brings in a few jobbers along for the ride in a million man handicap match to take on DX...and yet against all odds, DX wins. Joke's on you Vince. Ha.....ha.
Special Attraction Match: Terrell Owens vs. Randy Orton
Orton finally retires from the "Legend Killer" business and wants to prove he's the best pro athlete anywhere. Terrell Owens, taking the route of Lawrence Taylor and Mike Tyson before him, washed up and unemployed, answers Orton's challenge. Remember LT vs. Bam Bam Bigelow at Mania 11? This is this generation's football/wrestling crossover slobberknocker!
Barry Sanders vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.
Hey, we're in Ford Field at Detroit. Time to push the ante and have a psychotic heel Rey Mysterio take on a Detroit Lions football legend while we're at it. Yup, this is Vince McMahon's ring and we're living in it.
Handicap match for the WWE Championship: John Cena and his chain gang marks vs. Edge and his Internet smarks
Makes you wonder how much of the population downright hates Cena and those who foolishly love his ghetto white rapper gimmick. Eminem will also be in Cena's corner and winds up screwing him in the end, and hence, we have our main event for WrestleMania 24.