I am writing Beltre this theory! It could do his stats better, too!
May to July
1. Get back on the Juice.
2. Hit 10-12 HR's, Get that BA around 260.
3. Stop stealing (since he will get thick and can't run).
July
1. Get busted (it's inevitable)
2. Serve the 50 games
Late August
1. Come back and suck again for a week.
2. Get back on the juice after your first re-test.
September 15th - October
1. Hit 5 HR's
2. Get Busted, but appeal and find a technicality.
3. Start the same regime next year!
It's just a theory, otherwise, it's 3 HR's, BA 167, 15 Steals.