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MARK PRIOR DIAGNOSED WITH "DBS"

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MARK PRIOR DIAGNOSED WITH "DBS"

Postby Just Admit It Pete » Mon Jul 19, 2004 2:03 pm

A.P., Chicago- Mark Prior was diagnosed Monday morning with "DBS" (Dusty Baker Syndrome). This was disclosed by an annonymous source inside the Chicago Cubs organization who is probably dead by now. "DBS" is a a disease that can go undetected until you are traded to a particular major league team. Symptoms of "DBS" include a pain sensation in the shoulder and elbow even though doctors around you insist that nothing is wrong with you. This source also disclosed that Kerry Wood is suffering from "DBS", but this is just speculation. The only rumored cure for "DBS is to rub some Bobby Cox or some Tony Larussa on the affected areas once or twice a week, although these cures are hard to find in Illinois. Jason Schmidt, who was rumored to previously have "DBS", allegedly was able to cure it by treating the arm with some Felipe Alou. What can you do if you think you have "DBS"? Well, its not an exact science but see your doctor immediately but be sure to avoid Dr. Jim Hendry and Dr. Larry Rothschild in Chicago becasue they are known to misdiagnose this problem. Also, if you are on the mound in the 6th inning and you have already thrown 120 pitches and someone with a toothpick tells you to get out there and make him proud, all you have to do is softly walk the first three batters and symptoms will subside. Remember, once you are diagnosed with "DBS" you will be told for about a month that you are fine before someone steps in to offer you any help.
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Postby The Jury » Mon Jul 19, 2004 2:25 pm

HAHAHA. Excellent.
[quote:4fef447375="Geek"]The odds of the AL MVP coming from the American League are looking pretty good.[/quote]
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Postby Danimal » Mon Jul 19, 2004 2:37 pm

;-D ;-D ;-D ;-D ;-D ;-D
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Postby WhiteHot » Mon Jul 19, 2004 2:44 pm

I thought DBS was Dirrahea Bowel Syndrom, a real disease.
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Postby Krunk City King$ » Mon Jul 19, 2004 3:03 pm

classic!

;-D
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Postby Amazinz » Mon Jul 19, 2004 3:06 pm

WhiteHot wrote:I thought DBS was Dirrahea Bowel Syndrom, a real disease.

LOL. That's IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). :-D
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Postby Mookie4ever » Mon Jul 19, 2004 3:19 pm

Amazinz wrote:
WhiteHot wrote:I thought DBS was Dirrahea Bowel Syndrom, a real disease.

LOL. That's IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). :-D


Kelsey Grammer's (Frasier's) wife has this - she is hot, I hope that she gets over the bowel thing.
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Postby mikcou » Mon Jul 19, 2004 3:49 pm

Amazinz wrote:
WhiteHot wrote:I thought DBS was Dirrahea Bowel Syndrom, a real disease.

LOL. That's IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). :-D


lol ;-D
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Postby Super GM » Mon Jul 19, 2004 5:47 pm

Haha! Good job pete! ;-D
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Postby Madison » Tue Jul 20, 2004 3:08 am

Wait until DHC sees this one. :-o

Lol! :-D
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