Some good ones:
Baltimore Orioles: "Chicks Dig The Long Ball; Fat Chicks From Baltimore Settle For Warning Track Power."
Boston Red Sox: "The New York Yankees Sodomize Orphaned Puppies -- We Adopt Them."
New York Mets: "Big Market Payroll, Small Market Results."
San Francisco Giants: "90 Percent Of The Game Is Half Barry Bonds Obsessively-Compulsively Adjusting His Body Armor."
Tampa Bay Devil Rays: "According To A Recent Panel Of Judges In USA Today, Hitting A Baseball Is The Single Hardest Thing To Do In Professional Sports ... So Cut Us Some %*@$* Slack, Would Ya?"
"Jack, will you call me, if you're able?"
"I've got your phone number written, in the back of my Bible."