StlSluggers wrote: AussieDodger wrote:
JTWood wrote:Mastercard doesn't issue cards. We only process the transaction and take a cut.
That's why you see Bank of America Mastercard, Fifth-Third MasterCard, Citi Mastercard...
Those are the banks lending the money and, thus, setting the rates. I can't do a thing for you.
What other kinds of MasterCards are there?
Well, there's the Tony LaRussa MasterCard. They give it to people who are extraordinary leaders that lift up everyone around them with their amazing decision-making skills. I'm pretty sure you wouldn't qualify.
For you, I could suggest the Enron MasterCard. It's for descendants of criminals who manage to bring down thousands of lives just with their mere presence.
My friend, I believe you are reading your MasterCard propaganda pamphlet incorrectly. The LaRussa MasterCard is for convicted drunk drivers and suspected paedophiles (it's also for people who don't like Anthony Reyes).
Seeing as I'm not an Australian born, and therefore not descended from criminals, I believe you would direct me to the Tom Selleck/Chuck Norris card. It's for people who are unquestionably awesome.