So my fiance left me about 2-3 weeks ago. The hardest thing I am dealing with is being bored. What do people do to stay busy. A lot of my friends have their own lives and don't have many hours to sneak away and do things. I kind of want to stay away from the bars because I really just don't want to drink my problems away and I really don't want to fall victim to a bar girl.
Also, where do people meet girls at? I've been out of the game for so long, I have no idea. I am even thinking of taking some classes at the local college thinking I'll meet some people. I am 24 by the way.
You have no frame of reference, Donny. You're like a child who walks into the middle of a movie...
Phatferd wrote:So my fiance left me about 2-3 weeks ago. The hardest thing I am dealing with is being bored. What do people do to stay busy. A lot of my friends have their own lives and don't have many hours to sneak away and do things. I kind of want to stay away from the bars because I really just don't want to drink my problems away and I really don't want to fall victim to a bar girl.
Also, where do people meet girls at? I've been out of the game for so long, I have no idea. I am even thinking of taking some classes at the local college thinking I'll meet some people. I am 24 by the way.
yikes, tough break. at least from the sound of it, it seems you are over the broken hearted part.
my suggestion would be to join something...any type of club, activity, church (if you're religious at all) and you're likely to find something. going back to school is a great idea to meet a few new people and even better yourself in the process. what about the workplace? im sure there are a few ladies around who are single.
worse comes to worst, you can always look up some "casual encounters" on craigslist.
I lived this about a year and a half ago, for anyone who remembers. It sucks. I drank heavily, brought girls home from the bar, stopped going to work. It was an absolute mess. Then I finally decided to get my crap together. I wound up moving back down towards the city, about two hours south of Albany where I was living at the time, got into a new graduate program, found a new teaching job, and reconnected with a lot of people I hadn't seen in awhile. I meet girls everywhere: work, the grocery store, bookstore, the bar, parties and other get togethers, grad. class; anywhere with people. You just have to be willing to meet people, which you honestly may not be for awhile. Anyway, if you have any other specific questions, feel free to PM me, I'm more than willing to talk, cause when I went through it it was nearly deabilitating an really screwed up my life for some time. What you need to know is, you'll be fine. I promise. I a 24 by the way (since we're seemingly sharing that also ).
Work, although that's always a bit tricky...I wouldn't recommend that unless you find someone there that you think is just really really awesome.
There always seem to be attractive, intelligent women at upscale health-conscious grocery stores...like Whole Foods.
Local businesses...could be the girl you're buying a cell phone from, etc.
Someone who works at a place you tend to hang out at a decent amount of time...this could be anywhere really.
If you're only 24, the college idea you mentioned could be a good one.
Through friends...they may know someone who they think could be good for you...yada yada yada.
Or join a club that involves socializing like others have said...I prefer the Whole Foods ladies myself.
Hope that gives you a nice start.
I'm sorry to hear about your loss...having a plan for the future suddenly thrown into turmoil can really suck, but you'll get through it. There are plently of women out there, and doubtless there are some who can make you happy.
I have trouble getting together with friends too. Despite them having crazy shifts and families, they generally like to have a guys night at least once a month, so I try to be proactive in planning activities. Always good to have something to look forward to. Maybe start planning a ridiculous live fantasy football draft or regular poker nights.
Do you have a dog? At least there's a walk waiting for you everyday. And of course popular opinion is that dog walking can help you meet girls.
Good advice on trying to find group activities. I had no trouble finding a hiking group when I moved to a new place and I'm thinking of looking into a Toastmasters group. They're in pretty much every city.
Also try getting your baseball leagues to do live drafts with subsequent live events like an All-Star Game party, end of year celebration, and winter meeting.
“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” --Henry David Thoreau
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by Phatferd » Tue Jun 03, 2008 6:30 pm 
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