Need Devious Suggestions - Realtor Vengeance

[knapplc]

I have a buddy in California whose apartment complex is becoming Condos. She is being harassed almost daily by a Realtor trying to sell the place, and the Realtor seems to have zero concern for my friend's schedule or convenience. She even harasses them if they're trying to do something silly, like SLEEP (her boyfriend works second shift) when the Realtor wants to show the place.

I told her that if the Realtor is being a psycho like this, she should do little things to get back at her, like leaving cans of roach spray on the kitchen counter or rat traps near the bedroom.

I'm looking for ideas to pass along to my friend along those lines. Nothing dangerous, criminal or nasty - just devious, and perhaps a little more clever than I'm being with those suggestions.

[KCollins1304]

If you have the realtor's home number, I would call them in the middle of the night. Oh inconvenient for you, realtor prick?

[knapplc]

If you have the realtor's home number, I would call them in the middle of the night. Oh inconvenient for you, realtor prick?

That would be funny, but I'm pretty sure she could get in legal trouble over that.

Some suggestions from the Football Cafe:

* Fry some liver before they come over. Apparently it stinks to high heaven.
* Draw a chalk outline of her boyfriend on the sidewalk outside her door.
* Leave a note in large lettering taped to her front door reminding her landlord to clean up the asbestos.




What are some legal but kind of nasty over-the-counter pharmaceuticals she could leave out on her bathroom sink? Something "normal" but still disgusting. Any ideas?

[KCollins1304]

If you have the realtor's home number, I would call them in the middle of the night. Oh inconvenient for you, realtor prick?

That would be funny, but I'm pretty sure she could get in legal trouble over that.

Some suggestions from the Football Cafe:

* Fry some liver before they come over. Apparently it stinks to high heaven.
* Draw a chalk outline of her boyfriend on the sidewalk outside her door.
* Leave a note in large lettering taped to her front door reminding her landlord to clean up the asbestos.




What are some legal but kind of nasty over-the-counter pharmaceuticals she could leave out on her bathroom sink? Something "normal" but still disgusting. Any ideas?

Hemroid cream

[knapplc]

Hemroid cream

Good one. I'd suggest some kind of personal lubricant, but she's not that kind of girl.

[RugbyD]

buy a queen-size black sheet and spray-spaint a white or red pentagram on it. get a good amount of candle wax built up at each point on the star. use some veggie or olive oil to stain a portion near the middle to give the impression that past sacrifices couldn't be completely washed out. leave it out in the middle of the common area with the coffee table moved off to the side before a showing. If you really want to get aggressive, leave a large, beat up wood block stained with BBQ sauce or red food coloring in the middle.

The Orkin man can discredit a false roach alarm, but he's no Ghostbuster!

[AussieDodger]

Why stop with the sprays - why not have dead rats lying around if you know they're coming over?
Or get her friends to dress up really rough and dirty, and hang around outside her door when they come over.

[knapplc]

Why stop with the sprays - why not have dead rats lying around if you know they're coming over?

They don't sell dead rats at the local five-and-dime. Where's she going to get one? It's not like the apartment actually has rats.

buy a queen-size black sheet and spray-spaint a white or red pentagram on it. get a good amount of candle wax built up at each point on the star. use some veggie or olive oil to stain a portion near the middle to give the impression that past sacrifices couldn't be completely washed out. leave it out in the middle of the common area with the coffee table moved off to the side before a showing. If you really want to get aggressive, leave a large, beat up wood block stained with BBQ sauce or red food coloring in the middle.

That is wonderfully creepy and disturbing. I'll pass it along.

[Yoda]

I would create a shrine of newspaper clippings of your favorite celebrity. As if you are stalking him/her.

[Steve-o]

Fleas are freakin impossible to get rid of. Leave some brochures about flea removal out.