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Amusing Craig's List Post

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Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby Field » Wed Oct 10, 2007 8:10 pm

Reply to: mailto:pers-439244849@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-10-03, 4:18PM CDT


THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York . I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front
about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial
interests
Craig's List PostingID:

THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't
be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset . Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful "
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know.

____________
Rob Campbell
J.P.Morgan
Diversified Industrials Investment Banking
277 Park Avenue , 16/F, New York, NY 10172


Talk about shallow, 250K/year isn't enough for her? I love how the guy who responded left his work signature- classic.
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby JTWood » Wed Oct 10, 2007 8:47 pm

lmao @ depreciating asset :-D ;-D
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby The Artful Dodger » Wed Oct 10, 2007 9:12 pm

JTWood wrote:lmao @ depreciating asset :-D ;-D


Same here. :-b

Not shocking to read a girl rant like this if she's indeed being genuine; I've come in contact with a LOT of girls like that. :-P
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It's kinda like the Old Cafe - http://fbc2.freeforums.net
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby Tavish » Wed Oct 10, 2007 9:24 pm

The Artful Dodger wrote:
JTWood wrote:lmao @ depreciating asset :-D ;-D


Same here. :-b

Not shocking to read a girl rant like this if she's indeed being genuine; I've come in contact with a LOT of girls like that. :-P

I think my favorite part is where she seems confused on how there are "plain" looking women with rich guys. She seems to at least be upfront about her superficiality, but just doesn't grasp the concept that not all people are like that.
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby BronXBombers51 » Wed Oct 10, 2007 9:43 pm

That guy's response had me rolling. :-b
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby Madison » Wed Oct 10, 2007 11:02 pm

Now that was a good laugh. Thanks! :-b
Yes doctor, I am sick.
Sick of those who are spineless.
Sick of those who feel self-entitled.
Sick of those who are hypocrites.
Yes doctor, an army is forming.
Yes doctor, there will be a war.
Yes doctor, there will be blood.....
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby Art Vandelay » Thu Oct 11, 2007 1:29 am

Aside from the ridiculous notion that someone making $1,000,000/year is "middle class" anywhere, I found this pretty interesting. Also, it gives me some new ammo when arguing with with my wife: I have to assume, for obvious reasons, that she's not with me for my looks, but rather my rapier wit and brilliant sense of humor (among other things), both of which will most likely improve as I age. By the time I'm 50 I'll be even more hilarious and brilliant, while she'll be a haggard old lady, therefore, I'm clearly of more value to her than she is to me, so if she wants to keep me, she should go mow the lawn, then come in and give me a massage when she's done.
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby JTWood » Thu Oct 11, 2007 8:28 am

Art Vandelay wrote:Also, it gives me some new ammo when arguing with with my wife: I have to assume, for obvious reasons, that she's not with me for my looks...

Oh, man, Art... All this time, I just assumed that was George Costanza in your sig. I didn't realize it was you.
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby Mookie4ever » Thu Oct 11, 2007 8:51 am

Classic pump and dump ;-D
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Re: Amusing Craig's List Post

Postby tuff_gong » Sun Oct 14, 2007 4:33 pm

That guy is awesome.
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Well that's just like, your opinion man.
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