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Dumb injuries and even dumber players...

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Postby j_d_mcnugent » Tue Jan 27, 2004 1:43 pm

http://www.homestead.com/outofbounds/injury.html

1. Cardinals speedster Vince Coleman missed the 1985 World Series after he was run over by the automatic tarp machine.


2. Giants head-case third baseman Chris Brown once begged out of the lineup because of a strained eyelid.


3. Brewers pitcher Steve Sparks dislocated his shoulder trying to tear a *telephone book* in half as part of a motivational speech.


4. Braves reliever Cecil Upshaw tore up his ring finger on an overhead awning and ended his promising career while demonstrating imaginary basketball dunks.


5. Braves pitcher John Smoltz burned his chest trying to steam iron a shirt HE WAS WEARING AT THE TIME.


6. Slugger Rob Deer, who holds the dubious distinctions of leading the league in strikeouts five times while finishing his career with 556 more strikeouts (1,409) than hits (853), once broke his hand how else? by striking out.


7. Catcher-DH Mickey Tettleton, one of OOB's all time faves and the reason OOB wears #15 on his Rangers jersey, got an infected foot from tying his shoelaces too tight.


8. Pitcher Greg Harris once "strained his elbow" while "FLICKING SUNFLOWER SEEDS."


9. Cliff Johnson busted his ear drum with Q-tip in the locker room


10. Rick Honeycutt suffered a large scratch across the forehead when he, after being ejected for scuffing the ball with a tack taped to his finger, wiped his brow in frustration.


11. Matt Mantei needed four stitches in his right thumb after cutting it while opening a can of dog food just before Spring Training 2002. Mantei was *already on rehab*.


12. Yankees left-hander Randy Keisler suffered"one of the most innovative baseball injuries of modern times" (according to ESPN, who obviously never saw this list) in May of 2002, when he was bit by a pygmy rattlesnake in his back yard. What made this injury particularly pitiful was that Keisler got hurt while he was already hurt. (He had shoulder surgery last October and hasn't pitched since. Now he's out at least another month. At least when David Cone was bitten by his mother's dog a few years ago, he only missed one start.) Asked about Keisler's run of bad luck, Yankees GM Brian Cashman replied: "He's snakebit." YUK.


13. Twins infielder Denny Hocking missed the 2002 AL Championship Series against Anaheim after
injuring the middle finger on his throwing hand during a postgame celebration following Minnesota's Division Series victory over Oakland. Hocking caught the final out in the decisive 5-4 victory over and the Twins piled on each other in the middle of the field. A teammate, whom Hocking believed was Jacque Jones, stepped on the middle finger of Hocking's right hand, splitting the nail in two places.


14. In the mid 1970's, the Rangers had a rare left-handed knuckle ball pitcher. According to at least one source, this is entirely true: Pitcher Charlie Hudson inadvertently SHOT HIMSELF IN THE FINGER. According to the book "Seasons in Hell," the league injury report read as follows:


KANSAS CITY: P Steve Busby- Torn Rotator Cuff
CHICAGO: 3B Bill Melton- Pulled Hamstring
TEXAS: P Charlie Hudson- Gunshot Wound

non-baseball - gus frerrotte got a concussion after head butting a wall to celebrate a touchdown.
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Postby j_d_mcnugent » Tue Jan 27, 2004 1:49 pm

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Postby Lofunzo » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:05 pm

Since football was already referenced, here's a good 1 from this year. There is also a nice fondue story towards the end:

Jaguars punter Chris Hanson will miss the rest of the season after gashing his leg with an axe while chopping a log in the locker-room in what was supposed to be a motivational stunt.

Hanson was put on the reserve list for non-football injuries Friday. Unlike players who are placed on injured reserve, those on the non-football list don't necessarily have to be paid by their teams. But the Jaguars said they will give Hanson his $375,000 US salary.


Hanson, the team's only Pro Bowl player last season, needed emergency surgery to repair damage to his right, non-kicking leg. He could be ready to kick again before the end of the season, but the Jaguars decided they couldn't afford the roster spot, so they decided to end his season.


Jacksonville signed Mark Royals, formerly of the Dolphins, to punt and hold for kicks. Royals was cut by Miami last month.


The embarrassing injury turned Hanson and the Jaguars into national laughingstocks, a prime topic of conversation on radio shows and in Internet chat rooms. The log Hanson was working on was put in the locker-room at the behest of coach Jack Del Rio, who used the mantra "keep chopping wood" to inspire his players when they got off to an 0-3 start.


"I'll find another slogan," Del Rio said. "The message was understood."


While the axe was removed shortly after the injury Thursday, the log remained in the locker-room Friday.


Before the axe was removed, several players did, in fact, take Del Rio seriously and chop the wood. Hanson got hurt while the position players were in meetings Thursday morning.


Hanson, who will be in a boot for four to six weeks, had not returned to the team as of Friday.


"We enjoyed it while it lasted," tight end Kyle Brady said of having the axe in the locker-room. "But obviously, something bad happened yesterday with it, so it had to go."


Royals had played in 211 straight games until the Dolphins released him two weeks ago. He averaged 40.2 yards a punt in the first three games.


"I was surprised when I got the call, especially the nature of the injury," Royals said. "You don't hear about that every day. I feel bad for Chris. I know him well. He's a great guy. He's had some unfortunate luck the last few years of his life."


In June 2002, Hanson, his wife and former Jaguars kicker Jaret Holmes were severely burned while they were making fondue at Hanson's house, and the fondue pot overturned.


Hanson didn't miss any playing time, however, because the accident happened in the off-season.
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Postby bell » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:24 pm

j_d_mcnugent wrote:11. Matt Mantei needed four stitches in his right thumb after cutting it while opening a can of dog food just before Spring Training 2002.

I did that once. Those dog can lids can make deep cuts. :-o
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Postby Guest » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:28 pm

Didnt Isringhausen hurt himself down in the minor by like punching a wall?
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Postby bell » Tue Jan 27, 2004 2:30 pm

Anonymous wrote:Didnt Isringhausen hurt himself down in the minor by like punching a wall?

He musta been imitating Tom Petty. !+)
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Postby GoDucks » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:03 pm

Wasn't Mark Quinn the guy that hurt himself Kung Fu fighting with his brother? That's the name that comes to mind.
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Postby j_d_mcnugent » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:35 pm

yup, that was mark quinn. he broke a rib kung fu fighting with his brother. he is now on the cardinals with matt (hurt ankle jumping down stairs morris), mike (slice thumb open with huge hunting knife) matheny, and jason (broken hand while punching a trash can weeks after stabbing himself in the leg) isringhausen. at least they will some interesting things to talk about in the clubhouse.
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Postby lesgrant » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:49 pm

Chuck Finley getting beat up by his wife. I'm not sure he missed any games but still...

Although his wife is pretty hot !+)
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Postby Lofunzo » Tue Jan 27, 2004 5:03 pm

lesgrant wrote:Chuck Finley getting beat up by his wife. I'm not sure he missed any games but still...

Although his wife is pretty hot !+)


Tawny Kittaen, right? Her grill could use work but she's hot. There were rumors that she died years ago but if that was the case, Chuck could have taken her. 8-o
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