I insisted on cooking the turkey this year. Apparently, no one knows how to cook a bird and if you leave it the hand of an old lady, you're asking for disaster.
The key is to get the white meat to finish at 160 degrees just as the dark meat finishes at 180. If you just cook the crap out of it out of fear of e. coli, then why bother? Get some tin foil and cover the breast. Insert probe thermometer and remove at 161 degrees... if the dark meat is undercooked, who cares? Anything over 170 on the white is a disaster.
I made gravy too; 5 tablespoons of butter with 4 cups of the pan drippings plus some white wine and salt/pepper. Awesome.
If you're a battery, you're either working or you're dead....