The Darwin Awards salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who accidentally kill themselves in really stupid ways.
Seems all the people who email me jokes are idiots then.
Thanks for the clarification.
Yes doctor, I am sick. Sick of those who are spineless. Sick of those who feel self-entitled. Sick of those who are hypocrites. Yes doctor, an army is forming. Yes doctor, there will be a war. Yes doctor, there will be blood.....
There's a few stories in which the person doesn't actually die, but still manage to prevent themselves from ever procreating. It essentially serves the same purpose, but they usually get Honorable Mentions instead of the actual Award.
Such as this one, one of my favorites
(30 July 2004, Georgia) A Walker County man's pants exploded while he was filling out forms for Social Service workers in front of his home.
Daniel, 39, was hard at work in his laboratory when uninvited guests knocked on the door. Because his work was rather secret, he poured two of the chemicals, red phosphorus and iodine, into an empty film cannister and stuffed it in his pocket before going out to greet his visitors. It was two social workers bearing forms, and Daniel walked them out to their car, sat in the back seat and began writing.
"He kept fiddling with his front right pants pocket," said the commander of the Drug Task Force. The film cannister was probably feeling warm as the red phosphorus and iodine began to react. These chemicals are key ingredients in the making of methamphetamine. What Daniel apparently did not know was that the now-boiling mixture of red phosphorus and iodine would soon reach 278 degrees Fahrenheit.
"All of a sudden, a loud bang happened, and fire shot from his pocket. It damaged the inside of the state vehicle." Daniel suffered second and third-degree burns to his testicles and leg. He was rushed to a Medical Center in Chattanooga, Tennessee, before being hauled off to jail. Sheriff's deputies raided the house and discovered his meth lab. He was charged with manufacture and possession of illegal drugs.
"That was one for the books," said a Walker County sheriff's spokesperson. "I've been in this business for more than 35 years, and that's a first.
ThatDude wrote:A 23-year old person needing a fake ID to prove she's 21?
There's something very wrong with that.
yeah i dont get that...unless she found a credit card or somethin too...
yeah...i saw this the other day...i thought it said she rang up $1000 on her credit card too
Yeah, this is classic identiy theft... if you want to pretend to be someone else by using their credit card, it may help to have an ID to back it up. It wasn't a matter of being old enough to buy booze... the fake ID here was to assume the identy of the person she was about rip off.
Quite an amazing coincidence.
But yeah, Darwin awards are only given to people who actually die as a result of their own stupidity.
If you're a battery, you're either working or you're dead....