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I'm Not Gonna Take It

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I'm Not Gonna Take It

Postby DaQ » Mon Jul 24, 2006 7:45 pm

I have a situation regarding my friends that I need advice from you guys on.

Since March, a group of us (figure around 8-9 - I was good friends with about 6 of them, but the other guys are friends of the other guys) started going out every Friday/Saturday night and this continued through the end of the school year.

Everything was going really well until our Senior year of High School officially ended - that's when things went awry. :-o

First, within the group, we'd always make fun of each other and we all had our moments. Now, it appeared that they were trying to make me the butt of their jokes more often than anyone else in the group. During my college orientation, they would keep calling me when I was out with some of the other Freshmen at my school and they would just be overall much more annoying. After a short while, I told them while the fun is all good, that I do not see a reason why they are directing things against me all of a sudden. Because I realized most of the group is very immature, I got no real answer.

The last straw came a couple of weeks ago. One of these friend's parents were away for the week, so he threw a party w/ beer, liquor, kegs, drugs, the usual for high school parties (of course my friend decides to tell me it's just a small party with a few kids, though I saw through it). I figured I'd be fine going straight edge that night (I don't smoke/drugs ever, and I don't really drink much, if really at all because of a chronic stomach-intestinal thing I have -when I'm at college this fall, I may drink a little more). I even briefed my friend hosting the party about this. So of course, when I walk through the door (I was one of the earlier people there), he asks if I want a smoke or a drink, with the couple of other people already there eager to hear my response. Not only that, but I felt pressured to do both while I was there. I eventually just decided to leave after a couple hours because the party wasn't worth it - also, these people from my high school I didnt care much for were there and were being their usual annoying selves.

After this incident, my friends went nuts on me apparently. They kicked me out of their "group" because I didn't succomb to their peer pressure at the party (sounds like a weird reason, doesn't it? :-? ) and then started to do stupid things like ring my doorbell every once in a while at like 1am. Also, they want to stay close to many people from high school, while I just want to go to college and get on with life - my name is getting tarnished here with these acquaintances because of these guys - not that I care really, but it's annoying. Since I think my record is pretty clean, I have to assume they are making up atleast some of the things they say about me to these people. Most recently, they made a group on Facebook for themselves, which now has basically become "ridicule DaQ". The pics of me they change digitally, so I somehow look like I've gained 30 pounds in one pic lol. I've stood up to them and talked to them about this, but to no avail. They don't even really listen, as they all act like their 5 and try to lure me into childish games before I simply hang up the phone or leave sicne I see it's going nowhere.

What should I do? The place I work at now seems like a great reprieve (get along well with the chicks and the other people there), but I think these "friends" are trying to spread my "false rep" as far as they can (they invited a couple of the college people I have on Facebook to their page), and I really don't know why (I can only pray they're not crazy enough to come to my work and try to go nuts there).
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Postby The Miner Part 2 » Mon Jul 24, 2006 7:50 pm

get a bat and wait in one of thier bushes every night of this week.

alright well that's wishful thinking. i think the answer is obvious. these guys are knobs, ignore them and get on with your life like you were saying. who gives a damn what garbage they spread about you.
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Postby Omaha Red Sox » Mon Jul 24, 2006 9:36 pm

The Miner Part 2 wrote:alright well that's wishful thinking. i think the answer is obvious. these guys are knobs, ignore them and get on with your life like you were saying. who gives a damn what garbage they spread about you.


Yep, basically. These guys aren't your friends. :-t
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Postby sportsguy138 » Mon Jul 24, 2006 9:55 pm

Omaha Red Sox wrote:
The Miner Part 2 wrote:alright well that's wishful thinking. i think the answer is obvious. these guys are knobs, ignore them and get on with your life like you were saying. who gives a damn what garbage they spread about you.


Yep, basically. These guys aren't your friends. :-t


yep its not worth puttin up with their BS... i know its hard to do but you need to ignore them and try to find different friends.. these guys just dont act like their one of your close friends..

those are very childish kind of things their doing though IMO.. thats pathetic :-t
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Postby bigh0rt » Mon Jul 24, 2006 10:25 pm

Weak. Go to college. Find new friends.
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Postby Absolutely Adequate » Mon Jul 24, 2006 10:35 pm

bigh0rt wrote:Weak. Go to college. Find new friends.


Yup. That's the ticket. Because you keep talking to them about it, they keep doing it. It's against the code of men. You're supposed to take it and ignore it and they'll let you be.

Also, because you made a point of telling your friend you won't drink, he made a point of offering you a drink. It's how it works. You'd be better off if you didn't make such a big deal out of things. It's probably too late with these guys since you've become the butt of the jokes, but - in the future - don't talk about your feelings with your friends and you won't get picked on.
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Postby The Miner Part 2 » Mon Jul 24, 2006 11:18 pm

Absolutely Adequate wrote:in the future - don't talk about your feelings with your friends and you won't get picked on.


as sad as that sounds it's the right advice. the last thing i want is one of my friends crying to me about his problems. i mean there are obvious exceptions to the rule, but in general i dont need to hear my emo friends troubles. we all got troubles.
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Postby knapplc » Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:12 am

You're going to college - what are they doing? Are they going to college too? Are they going to a college they see as the same/similar as yours, or is it a lesser school, like a community college? If that's the case, that may be your answer for why they've chosen you.

Jealousy is a powerful drug.

Speaking of drugs, sounds like these guys are maybe not the most responsible guys to be hanging around anyway. Yeah it's tough to cut your friends loose, but in this case it looks like the decision may have been made for you. Move out and move on. After a while they may come back to a more normal relationship with you, but they may just never grow out of this phase of their lives, while you do.

It's a tough thing to take sometimes, but you'll be OK.

Keep your chin up. Have fun at college. ;-D
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Postby 1337_Dude » Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:40 am

Your old friends suck. Find some new ones.
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Postby Phatferd » Tue Jul 25, 2006 4:04 am

You need to loosen up a little. Don't get me wrong these people are toolbags and jealous. I remember your post about your prom and not going and being tired when you got back and your friends wanting you to go, etc. You seem to have a lot of oddball reasons for things (GI problems so thats why you don't drink). I have IBS and I drink like a fish. As a young man these things are bait to anyone to pick on you.

I drink and enjoy drinking with friends, but one of my best buddies (roomate) doesn't drink and I am totally cool with it so your real friends should be. I don't want to come off as harsh, but if you are going to college you will have a fresh start and I am just trying to help.

Forget these guys and move on. When you get to college, just go with the flow. You don't have to drink or whatever, but go to parties and don't be uptight. Go with an open mind and talk to everyone there. If someone offers you a drink and you don't want to drink then say you're the DD, its a great excuse that doesn't make you look like wimp, if that's what you're worried about.

Smoke a joint it's one of the best ways to loosen up.... ;-D
You have no frame of reference, Donny. You're like a child who walks into the middle of a movie...
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