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Re: American Man

Postby The_Met_Threat » Fri Jul 07, 2006 2:02 pm

Dan Lambskin wrote:
Omaha Red Sox wrote:
DevilDriver wrote:
Have $50,000 - 82%

or

Have a three-way with Angelina Jolie and Scarlett Johansson - 18%

8-o


I take it you would take the action over the money?


i would. what would i do with $50K, buy some lame sportscar or retire a year early or take a dream vacation...that aint worth the memories of that romp in the hay.


You could whore yourself out to 50 fat chicks for 1000 bucks a piece.
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Postby Absolutely Adequate » Fri Jul 07, 2006 2:46 pm

Survey of a real American Man:

1. Who is the most admirable man in America?

Warren Buffet

2. Who is the least admirable man in America?

George W. Bush

3. Whom did you vote for in the 2004 presidential election? And if the election were held again today?

John Kerry

4. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "very conservative" and 10 is "very liberal," how would you rate your political view.

South - 9

5. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "strongly disagree" and 10 is strongly agree," what's your opinion about the following statement: "America has peaked as a global power."

8

6. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "very pessimistic" and 10 is very optimistic," how would you rate your outlook on the following issues?

The U.S. economy - 4

The degree to which American are protected from terrorism - 3

The degree to which Americans' privacy rights are protected - 2

The war in Iraq - 1

The U.S. becoming less dependent on foreign oil - 2

7. Which of the following best describes your level of alcohol consumption?

I have a few drinks a week.

8. Would you be in favor of mandatory public service (not necessarily military) for every U.S. citizen?

Yes: (sort of. Maybe in exchange for a college scholarship?)

9. Did you see Brokeback Mountain?

Not yet, but I plan to

10. Have you read the Da Vinci Code?

No, and I don't plan to:

11. Which of these three words best describes your belief (or not) in God?

Agnostic, leaning towards athiest

12. How often do you go to church, synagogue, mosque or other house of worship?

Never

13. Have you ever cheated on your wife or significant other?

No

14. What single attribute do you value most in a mate?

Intelligence

15. Would you rather...

Be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company

Give up alcohol

Have a three-way with Angelina Jolie and Scarlett Johansson

Go out drinking with Jack Nicholson

Be tall, charismatic and impoverished

16. How many books have you read in the past twelve months?

Fiction

Twenty or more

Nonfiction

Twenty or more


17. Have you ever visited a foreign country besides Mexico or Canada?

Yes

18. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "not worried at all" and 10 is "very worried," how concerned are you about the following issues?

Your future earning potential: 1

Getting fat: 2

Your job security: 1

Losing your hair: 2

The faithfulness of your wife or girlfriend: 1

19. Have you ever downloaded a podcast?

No

20. How would compare your financial security right now with your father's when he was your age?

More secure

21. Have you ever been fired from a job past the age of twenty-one?

No

22. How old were you when you lost your virginity?

14

23. Assuming they had identical qualifications, would you prefer reporting to a female boss or a male boss?

No preference

24. What is the most important indicator of job satisfaction?

Doing something you love:

25. How much cash do you have on you right now?

Not a cent:
26. How much credit card debt are you carrying at the moment?

Average: 0

27. How many sex partners have you had?

Average: 30ish

28. How many suits do you own?

South - 3

29. You're hosting a dinner party and you can invite three men and three women from the following lists. Who's coming to dinner? (Percentage is number who selected each person among their three choices.)

WOMEN

Angelina Jolie

Hillary Clinton

Rachael Ray (somebody has to cook)

MEN


Bill Clinton

George Clooney

Jon Stewart


There you have it. The real answers.
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Postby Art Vandelay » Fri Jul 07, 2006 3:19 pm

Survey of a real American Man:

1. Who is the most admirable man in America?

Impossible question to answer, how could anyone possibly know this?

2. Who is the least admirable man in America?

Same as above.

3. Whom did you vote for in the 2004 presidential election? And if the election were held again today?

2004 - Other
Today- Other

4. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "very conservative" and 10 is "very liberal," how would you rate your political view.

Depends. I'm a registered independant who tends to sway widely from left to right on issue to issue. Overall I'd say I'm a 10 on social issues and a 3 or 4 on fiscal issues.

5. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "strongly disagree" and 10 is strongly agree," what's your opinion about the following statement: "America has peaked as a global power."

7

6. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "very pessimistic" and 10 is very optimistic," how would you rate your outlook on the following issues?

The U.S. economy - 6

The degree to which American are protected from terrorism - 9

The degree to which Americans' privacy rights are protected - 3

The war in Iraq - 1

The U.S. becoming less dependent on foreign oil - 10

7. Which of the following best describes your level of alcohol consumption?

I have a few drinks a week.

8. Would you be in favor of mandatory public service (not necessarily military) for every U.S. citizen?

God no. Horrible idea.

9. Did you see Brokeback Mountain?

Not yet, but I plan to

10. Have you read the Da Vinci Code?

No, and I don't plan to, but I have listened to the audio version

11. Which of these three words best describes your belief (or not) in God?

Diest, leaning towards agnostic.

12. How often do you go to church, synagogue, mosque or other house of worship?

Only on holidays, plus a few other times sprinkled throughout the year.

13. Have you ever cheated on your wife or significant other?

No

14. What single attribute do you value most in a mate?

kindness

15. Would you rather...

CEO

alcohol

$50,000

Go out drinking with Jack Nicholson

Be tall, charismatic and impoverished

16. How many books have you read in the past twelve months?

Fiction

10-12

Nonfiction

Twenty or more


17. Have you ever visited a foreign country besides Mexico or Canada?

No

18. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "not worried at all" and 10 is "very worried," how concerned are you about the following issues?

Your future earning potential: 1

Getting fat: 1

Your job security: 1

Losing your hair: 1

The faithfulness of your wife or girlfriend: 1

19. Have you ever downloaded a podcast?

No

20. How would compare your financial security right now with your father's when he was your age?

More secure

21. Have you ever been fired from a job past the age of twenty-one?

No

22. How old were you when you lost your virginity?

17

23. Assuming they had identical qualifications, would you prefer reporting to a female boss or a male boss?

No preference

24. What is the most important indicator of job satisfaction?

Doing something you love:

25. How much cash do you have on you right now?

$24
26. How much credit card debt are you carrying at the moment?

less than $1,000

27. How many sex partners have you had?

3

28. How many suits do you own?

0

29. You're hosting a dinner party and you can invite three men and three women from the following lists. Who's coming to dinner? (Percentage is number who selected each person among their three choices.)

WOMEN

Angelina Jolie

Rachel Ray

Katie Couric

MEN

John Stewart

George W. Bush

Bod Dylan
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Postby Omaha Red Sox » Fri Jul 07, 2006 3:54 pm

1. Who is the most admirable man in America?

I agree with AV, that this cannot be truthfully answered, but out of the options, I'd go:

Colin Powell

2. Who is the least admirable man in America?

Ted Kennedy

3. Whom did you vote for in the 2004 presidential election? And if the election were held again today?

2004 - Dubya

Today - Dubya

4. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "very conservative" and 10 is "very liberal," how would you rate your political view.

It varies depending on the issue, but I'd probably average out to about a 3.

5. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "strongly disagree" and 10 is strongly agree," what's your opinion about the following statement: "America has peaked as a global power."

8

6. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "very pessimistic" and 10 is very optimistic," how would you rate your outlook on the following issues?

The U.S. economy - 7

The degree to which American are protected from terrorism - 8

The degree to which Americans' privacy rights are protected - 6

The war in Iraq - 4

The U.S. becoming less dependent on foreign oil - 5

7. Which of the following best describes your level of alcohol consumption?

I have a few drinks a week.

8. Would you be in favor of mandatory public service (not necessarily military) for every U.S. citizen?

No.

9. Did you see Brokeback Mountain?

No, and I don't plan to

10. Have you read the Da Vinci Code?

No, and I don't plan to

11. Which of these three words best describes your belief (or not) in God?

Believer

12. How often do you go to church, synagogue, mosque or other house of worship?

At least once a week

13. Have you ever cheated on your wife or significant other?

Yes. Girlfriend years ago, not current.

14. What single attribute do you value most in a mate?

Sense of humor

15. Would you rather...

Be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company

or

Be the next American Idol

Give up alcohol

or

Give up sex

Have $50,000

or

Have a three-way with Angelina Jolie and Scarlett Johansson

Play a round of golf at Augusta National

or

Go out drinking with Jack Nicholson

Be short, boring and rich

or

Be tall, charismatic and impoverished

16. How many books have you read in the past twelve months?

Fiction

Maybe 3

Nonfiction

Around 20

17. Have you ever visited a foreign country besides Mexico or Canada?

Yes

18. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is "not worried at all" and 10 is "very worried," how concerned are you about the following issues?

Your future earning potential: 1

Getting fat: 3

Your job security: 1

Losing your hair: 1

The faithfulness of your wife or girlfriend: 1

19. Have you ever downloaded a podcast?

What's a podcast?

20. How would compare your financial security right now with your father's when he was your age?

More secure

21. Have you ever been fired from a job past the age of twenty-one?

No

22. How old were you when you lost your virginity?

16

23. Assuming they had identical qualifications, would you prefer reporting to a female boss or a male boss?

No preference

24. What is the most important indicator of job satisfaction?

Working for and with people you like and respect

25. How much cash do you have on you right now?

$100 to $149.99

26. How much credit card debt are you carrying at the moment?

Less than $500

27. How many sex partners have you had?

13

28. How many suits do you own?

Around 20

29. You're hosting a dinner party and you can invite three men and three women from the following lists. Who's coming to dinner? (Percentage is number who selected each person among their three choices.)

WOMEN

Condoleezza Rice

Oprah Winfrey

Angelina Jolie

Julia Roberts

Faith Hill

Jennifer Aniston

Hillary Clinton

Katie Couric

Rachael Ray

Ellen DeGeneres

Jessica Simpson

Madonna

Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Maureen Dowd

MEN

Jay Leno

Bill Clinton

George Clooney

George W. Bush

Tiger Woods

Jon Stewart

Bill O'Reilly

Bono

Dick Cheney

Bob Dylan

Howard Stern

LeBron James

Johnny Knoxville

Eminem
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Postby Madison » Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:08 pm

78 percent of our panel of more than one thousand men said they believe in God


Yet we continue to remove God from everything in the country because it offends the minority.

Makes sense. ;-7
Yes doctor, I am sick.
Sick of those who are spineless.
Sick of those who feel self-entitled.
Sick of those who are hypocrites.
Yes doctor, an army is forming.
Yes doctor, there will be a war.
Yes doctor, there will be blood.....
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Postby Omaha Red Sox » Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:23 pm

Madison wrote:
78 percent of our panel of more than one thousand men said they believe in God


Yet we continue to remove God from everything in the country because it offends the minority.

Makes sense. ;-7


As a Mod, should you be saying the word 'God', Madison? :-o ;-)
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Postby Madison » Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:26 pm

Omaha Red Sox wrote:
Madison wrote:
78 percent of our panel of more than one thousand men said they believe in God


Yet we continue to remove God from everything in the country because it offends the minority.

Makes sense. ;-7


As a Mod, should you be saying the word 'God', Madison? :-o ;-)


Mod? What Mod? I have no microphone icon. O:-)
Yes doctor, I am sick.
Sick of those who are spineless.
Sick of those who feel self-entitled.
Sick of those who are hypocrites.
Yes doctor, an army is forming.
Yes doctor, there will be a war.
Yes doctor, there will be blood.....
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Postby 5 » Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:41 pm

Madison wrote:
78 percent of our panel of more than one thousand men said they believe in God


Yet we continue to remove God from everything in the country because it offends the minority.

Makes sense. ;-7


Do you really think the Ten Commandments belongs in a public setting...like a courthouse or town square?
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Re: American Man

Postby Simulacrum » Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:43 pm

Dan Lambskin wrote:except for Horse-Face being there...i know this survey is a sham if Julia Roberts is considered hot :-P


She's hotter than that disgusting tramp Angelina Jolie :-P
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Postby Omaha Red Sox » Fri Jul 07, 2006 4:45 pm

5 wrote:
Madison wrote:
78 percent of our panel of more than one thousand men said they believe in God


Yet we continue to remove God from everything in the country because it offends the minority.

Makes sense. ;-7


Do you really think the Ten Commandments belongs in a public setting...like a courthouse or town square?


Because we shouldn't follow them or because they're from a Bible? People are so damn scared of traditionalism.
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