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BSSC Round 2 - Troy McClure vs. Moe

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Troy or Moe?

Poll ended at Fri Oct 28, 2005 11:03 am

Troy McClure
8
27%
Moe Szyslak
22
73%
 
Total votes : 30

BSSC Round 2 - Troy McClure vs. Moe

Postby ironman » Wed Oct 26, 2005 11:03 am

Troy McClure

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Wikipedia wrote:Troy McClure is a fictional character in the television cartoon series The Simpsons, voiced by Phil Hartman. After Hartman's murder in 1998, the character was retired (along with Hartman's other character, Lionel Hutz). His character last appeared in season ten's third episode, "Bart the Mother."

Troy is the stereotypical Hollywood has-been; ubiquitous presenter of educational videos, voiceovers, and infomercials. At one stage Troy McClure had a modestly successful acting career. When introducing the latest product he is paid to add his clean-cut good looks and smooth voice to, he always reminds us of his previous career with his standard introduction "Hi, I'm actor Troy McClure. You might remember me from such {films, educational videos, voiceovers} as," and then going on to list the kind of (often amusingly-titled) B-grade stuff that pays the bills but is hardly Oscar-winning material. He has narrated propaganda for everyone from the beef industry, to health farms, to the Springfield Nuclear Powerplant.

Troy's career reportedly went downhill due to his unusual paraphilia, which apparently involved fish. To cover this up, a marriage was arranged between himself and Marge's sister Selma, which revived his career to star in Stop the Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!, a musical version of the film Planet of the Apes (the episode was made well before the 2001 remake of the movie). Although Selma accepted the sham marriage, she drew the line when Troy's producers suggested that they have a child. Troy is now presumably spending time with his aquatic friends again. His name is an amalgam of B-movie actors Troy Donahue and Doug McClure.

In all ways, Troy is the exact opposite of Rainier Wolfcastle, another movie star from The Simpsons world. While Troy's films pay the bills, Rainer's films are blockbusters and are the ones that could win Oscars.


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Moe

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Wikipedia wrote:Moe Szyslak (pronounced SIZZ-lack, as opposed to the Polish pronunciation, SHISS-lack) is a fictional character on the animated series The Simpsons, voiced by Hank Azaria. Moe is the proprietor of Moe's Tavern ("Where nobody knows your name"—a spoof on the Cheers theme song, "Where Everybody Knows Your Name"), the regular drinking hole of Homer Simpson, Barney Gumble, and others. Hank Azaria says Moe's voice is based on Al Pacino with a sore throat.

Moe's full name is either Mommar Szyslak or Morris Szyslak. His ethnicity is unclear, since he is embarrassed by his past and does his best to conceal it publicly. He is generally thought to be an Italian immigrant, though he has also claimed to be Russian ("Flaming Moe's") Dutch (season 15), and from the U.S. state of Indiana. His last name, Szyslak, suggests Eastern European ancestry, most likely Polish or Hungarian. As far as religion is concerned, Moe was "born a snakehandler" and "will die a snakehandler," although he has also practiced voodoo, black magic and santeria in various episodes, such as "The Joy of Sect."

Allegedly, as a child Moe was a member of the original Little Rascals TV show, playing the role of the tough kid, "Smelly." Unfortunately he lost this job when he killed the original Alfalfa. This is likely a tall tale considering how old it would make him. At the age of ten he was then abandoned by his parents at a summer camp, where he worked as a cook (making him roughly the same age as Homer).

As a teenager, Moe was given his first job after an unknown amount of time in prison as a cafeteria worker in Springfield High. He was arrested in the high school after a teenage Marge Simpson and her friend, Chloe, caught him spitting in the soup.

He tried his hand at acting again when he auditioned for the part of Dr. Tad Winslow in the soap opera It Never Ends and was rejected for being too "ugly ugly." When he had a facelift twenty-five years later, he took over the role for a brief period before he was fired for sabotaging a year's worth of storylines live on the air.

As a young man Moe was a successful boxer. He fought under various names, first "Kid Gorgeous", then "Kid Presentable", then "Kid Gruesome", and finally "Kid Moe." Accordingly, he claims to have been called ugly, pug ugly, fugly, and pug fugly (although he was surprised to have been called "ugly ugly").

When his boxing career ended he went to bartender college and after he graduated he opened his own tavern, a job he has held ever since.

It is also implied at one point that Moe has a cow's heart, and is thus "aging six years for every one."

Moe's Tavern is probably not the birthplace of the Rob Roy, despite what Moe claims. Despite having a degree in bartending, Moe is horrible at mixing drinks, and Duff Beer is pretty much the only thing he serves. The only other notable drink that he mixes is the Flaming Moe (originally called the Flaming Homer, the recipe for which he stole from Homer without acknowledging it). He once pointed out that the liquor bottles that appeared to be behind the bar were actually painted on the wall. Moe's Tavern has a Rhode Island liquor licence which expired in 1973 and was signed by Moe himself. Moe admits the license to be a forgery, saying, "I've been meaning to get that updated, for this state, and, er, real."
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Postby pokerplaya » Wed Oct 26, 2005 11:04 am

It's gotta be the pug fugly Moe. :-b
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Postby raiders_umpire » Wed Oct 26, 2005 12:01 pm

Moe
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Postby StlSluggers » Wed Oct 26, 2005 12:50 pm

Yo know it be Moe!

;-D
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Postby bigken117 » Wed Oct 26, 2005 12:56 pm

Another good one. I just think Troy was a funnier character.
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Postby logan » Wed Oct 26, 2005 12:58 pm

gimme moe ;-D
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Postby curious_george_43545 » Wed Oct 26, 2005 3:22 pm

moe
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Postby daullaz » Wed Oct 26, 2005 3:37 pm

Gotta be Moe. He has what it takes to win the whole thing, if you ask me. ;-D
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Postby 3 run homer » Wed Oct 26, 2005 4:09 pm

Doh!!! I clicked on Troy and meant to click Moe. If it's a tie remember I truly wanted to click on Moe
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Postby acsguitar » Wed Oct 26, 2005 4:25 pm

TROY!!! How dare ye vote against the late great phil!
I'm too lazy to make a sig at the moment
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