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You know your a redneck when...

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Postby go_jays_go » Tue Aug 23, 2005 12:40 am

Top 9 reasons you know your a redneck...

1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife.

2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations.

3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.

4. You've never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket.

5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday.

6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper.

7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops.

8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway.

9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby.
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Postby wrveres » Tue Aug 23, 2005 12:43 am

The blue book value of your truck goes up and down
depending on how much gas it has in it.

You have to go outside to get something out of the
'fridge.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your
front yard.

You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of
paint to defend your sister's honor.

You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the
sound of a tornado.

You own a homemade fur coat.

Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

Your high school basketball game got rained out.

The people on Jerry Springer's show are your
neighbors.
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Postby go_jays_go » Tue Aug 23, 2005 12:47 am

wrveres wrote:The blue book value of your truck goes up and down
depending on how much gas it has in it.

You have to go outside to get something out of the
'fridge.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your
front yard.

You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of
paint to defend your sister's honor.

You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the
sound of a tornado.

You own a homemade fur coat.

Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

Your high school basketball game got rained out.

The people on Jerry Springer's show are your
neighbors.


Very funny wrveres :-b ;-D
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Postby mweir145 » Tue Aug 23, 2005 1:05 am

wrveres wrote:The blue book value of your truck goes up and down
depending on how much gas it has in it.

You have to go outside to get something out of the
'fridge.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your
front yard.

You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of
paint to defend your sister's honor.

You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the
sound of a tornado.

You own a homemade fur coat.

Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

Your high school basketball game got rained out.

The people on Jerry Springer's show are your
neighbors.

That's great. :-b
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Postby raiders_umpire » Tue Aug 23, 2005 8:57 am

go_jays_go wrote:Top 9 reasons you know your a redneck...

1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife. YES
2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations.
YES
3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.
YES, many times
4. You've never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket.
those things are just too dang useful to throw away
5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday.
I do struggle with my wifes birthday quite a bit
6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper.
YES
7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops.

8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway.
never at my house, but i have at my grandmas house
9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby.




well that was 7 of 9 for me being a redneck..... :-°
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Postby Pacman » Tue Aug 23, 2005 9:27 am

If you got to family reunions... to meet women.... you must be a redneck.
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Postby Lofunzo » Tue Aug 23, 2005 12:08 pm

If you have more furniture on your porch than in your house, you might be a redneck.

I also love this 1 and it is much more applicable now. :-o

WR wrote:The blue book value of your truck goes up and down
depending on how much gas it has in it.
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Postby Pacman » Tue Aug 23, 2005 2:31 pm

If you refer to the Fourth Grade as "My Senior Year"... you might be a redneck.
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Postby Lofunzo » Tue Aug 23, 2005 5:05 pm

If your whole block couldn't fill a mouth with teeth....you might be a redneck.
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Postby blankman » Tue Aug 23, 2005 5:13 pm

Umm, just listen to Jeff Foxworthy. This is half his act, not that its a bad thing.

Several of these listed are his, for example the water tower one.
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