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Bank procedures.....

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Bank procedures.....

Postby SaintsOfTheDiamond » Wed Aug 03, 2005 11:26 am

I just saw this for the first time in a while, and was laughing for a good 5 minutes. Oh, and this should use up most of my "sexism quota" for the day too. ;-7

A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.


FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.
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Postby RyanK » Wed Aug 03, 2005 11:32 am

;-D


my moms awful when she goes to the atm
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Postby pokerplaya » Wed Aug 03, 2005 11:38 am

:-b I'm sure my girlfriend id going to love this one. ;-7
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Postby Madison » Wed Aug 03, 2005 12:07 pm

I hate waiting behind idiots that don't know how to use an ATM machine. Friggin morons. :-[

Lol. :-b
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Sick of those who feel self-entitled.
Sick of those who are hypocrites.
Yes doctor, an army is forming.
Yes doctor, there will be a war.
Yes doctor, there will be blood.....
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Postby Shadow of the Sun* » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:03 pm

Great Joke ;-D
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Postby Big Pimpin » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:07 pm

That's awesome. ;-D
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Postby theskaboss » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:32 pm

I bag at a grocery store, and I sear thats exactly how it works when women want to pay with atm/credit. They dig through their purse, find their wallet, take out a pile of cards, find the card. Swipe the card the wrong way, flip it over, swipe again. Get wallet out of purse, put card back into pile, put wallet back into their purse. They hold up the line soooo much... :-t
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Postby acsguitar » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:34 pm

hahah soo true!
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Postby Dan Lambskin » Wed Aug 03, 2005 1:43 pm

what's she doing out of the kitchen anyway? i guess if she needed grocery money...
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