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I need some help

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I need some help

Postby DbacksAllTheWay » Sat Jul 30, 2005 4:59 am

I am very shy around girls, it's like I freeze up and i dont know wut to say or i am scared to say nething at all. Therefore, i have never really had a serious relationship. I like this girl right now and supposedly she likes me and when school starts again, what is a good way to help me become not shy and find a way to talk to her and see if she really likes me, im 15 by the way. Do u guys have ne ways to help me get out of being shy? Thanks a lot I really appreciate it.
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Postby PlayingWithFire » Sat Jul 30, 2005 5:31 am

watch a LOT of romantic movies.


Any picture would help the wise men here to have a strategy for you!!! :-)
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Postby davidmarver » Sat Jul 30, 2005 5:37 am

I am very shy around girls, it's like I freeze up and i dont know wut to say or i am scared to say nething at all. Therefore, i have never really had a serious relationship. I like this girl right now and supposedly she likes me and when school starts again, what is a good way to help me become not shy and find a way to talk to her and see if she really likes me, im 15 by the way. Do u guys have ne ways to help me get out of being shy? Thanks a lot I really appreciate it.

Let me give you a prelude about my relations with girls and then I'll relay you some advice (you're really in the same spot I was a few years back). When I was 15 (going into sophomore year) I hadn't had a long lasting relationship of any sort. I was shy, at first, with anyone, not just girls, and it really hurt me in making new friends. I had very good friends, it was just difficult to make a lot of new ones. Sophomore year came and went; I know girls liked me (their friends told me), but I was way too shy to ever ask them out on a date or even say anything more than 'hi'. The summer going into Junior year, though, things changed. I was with a good buddy of mine, a guy with a lot of success with girls, late on a Friday night (the time was actually 1:30) when I stopped at a Chevron near my house to clean off my windshield (we had just been out egging these girls...believe me they deserved it...and my buddy squeezed too tight before he threw one egg so a little yolk was on my own windshield). When we pull up to the station there's these three girls around a broken-down truck with a bed full of items: one girl is gorgeous with a huge rack, the other two not good looking. I don't know why I did because I had always been shy, but I managed to approach the girls and asked if they needed help; I have a pickup truck so the goods could be put in my truck. They say yes and the rest is history; we helped them move their stuff and I asked her for her phone number. She said yes and asked for mine in return. The next morning she called me, I went to her house, and we hooked up. I went from nothing to something in the blink of an eye.

That relationship wasn't much in comparison to my next one (which has been ongoing since March 13, 2004). There was this girl I had always had an eye on (since eighth grade to be exact). It was late-February in 2004 and I no longer was involved in any relationships (another girl, Sasha, came inbetween the girl I met at the station, Kelly, and this new girl, Amanda). Anyway, she's very quiet, probably moreso than I am, so I figured I needed to somehow talk to her on my own, even though I was a shy guy myself. We both had history class together, but I sat on the other side. I am very talkative in class and that worked in my favor. One day I became purposely noisy to the point where I was to be moved across the class (I had been warned it would happen if I talked too much again). Seeing as the spot across from her was open (this class had the huge desks that four people share) I decided that, when my teacher told me to move, that that would be a perfect place to sit. The plan worked to perfection; I was moved to that seat. I still had a problem, though. I was very shy and had never talked to her before. Even so, I managed to write her a note (on my calculator...no joke) to her asking her if she wanted to hang out on the weekend; I knew she's answer yes...I was more popular than her (sounds a little conceited, but she was in color guard, even though she was hot) and less-popular, shy girls have a tendency to be very obliging. I asked her out two weeks later and we are still together.

I know I just told you a lot, but it was all for a moral; don't be shy! It may feel un-natural to be not shy and you will feel uncomfortable, but speaking up will work. Girls don't like shy guys...they thrive on confident guys. Just don't be shy! There's really no other way to put it. Whether or not you pull some stupid stunt to switch seats, like I did, it doesn't matter; just be sure you make sure you don't pass up your opportunities. I'm sure 'just don't be shy' sounds difficult enough and it doesn't really help out too much, but there's really no other way to do it. Just put yourself in an uncomfortable position: crack a stupid joke, make fun of a teacher you both have, or simply tell her she looks nice and go from there...it's what works best. You cannot have less than no chance...it isn't statistically possible. Trust me, from a guy who was supremely shy, you just gotta let it flow; pretend you've known her for ages.
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Postby Madison » Sat Jul 30, 2005 5:55 am

The best thing I can tell you is that no matter what the girl says or does, what's the worst thing that can happen if you ask her out? She says no. Big deal. There are tons of girls everywhere and since you're in high school, there will be more girls down the road than you can count.

So in other words, relax. Nothing overly bad can happen if you ask her out and she's not interested. On the flipside, you could be golden with her, but you won't know until you ask. Basically zero risk, huge possible reward. Go for it and ask her out! ;-D
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Postby DaQ » Sat Jul 30, 2005 8:10 am

Thanks for the help! :*) (just playin')

DBacksAllTheWay probably has no clue about the inside joke you guys like to use with me. :-b
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Postby reznorsboy » Sat Jul 30, 2005 8:53 am

MAybe wwe should have a Forum for Romance advise :-b
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Postby Kingctb27 » Sat Jul 30, 2005 4:47 pm

reznorsboy wrote:MAybe wwe should have a Forum for Romance advise :-b

Agreed. It seems like we have something like this at least once a week. :-D

I would just ask for her # straight up. I always use "Maybe if we're around I'll give you a call and we can party or something". It usually works for me. :-)
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Postby Irish » Sat Jul 30, 2005 5:42 pm

Start Drinking, liquid courage is underrated. ;-D

If you think she likes you get a mutual friend to ask her as part of a natural conversation, so it doesn't seem like you are trying to find out.

Also, buy her some My Little Pony, or whatever the hell you 15 year olds do these days.
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Postby tuff_gong » Sat Jul 30, 2005 5:46 pm

I was that way when I was 14/15 as well. Just try and have confidence in yourself and like Madison said, there's basically low risk/very high reward with talking/asking a girl out. I'd actually just recommend trying to have conversations with girls you are just friends with, that was a good way for me to build up confidence. Good Luck! ;-D
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Well that's just like, your opinion man.
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Postby Pacman » Sat Jul 30, 2005 9:01 pm

As always, I must refer requests like this to the powerful words of Mike Damone, from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High". I've poted them twice before, and I won't here, rather link to the first time I shared Damone's famous Five Point Plan


Good luck, Dude.
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