Ok, I'll take a stab at it..........
Eftda was in the store, long hair a flowing, wearing a black trenchcoat, cigarette hanging from his mouth, and studying the baseball card rack. With $1.95 in his pocket he was trying to make a serious purchase for some enjoyment and to see if he would strike it rich by pulling a great insert card, or pulling a Barry Bonds memoribilia card to add to his personal collection. Due to it being so important to him, he was really studying the card packs and taking his time. The manager watched him for a half hour and then decided it was way too suspicious, so he asked Eftda to leave.
Ok, probably not anywhere close, but I was bored and figured I'd take a stab at it.
All in good fun Eftda.
Yes doctor, I am sick.
Sick of those who are spineless.
Sick of those who feel self-entitled.
Sick of those who are hypocrites.
Yes doctor, an army is forming.
Yes doctor, there will be a war.
Yes doctor, there will be blood.....