The Road From Bristol - Fantasy Baseball Cafe 2015 Fantasy Baseball Cafe

Return to General Talk

The Road From Bristol

Moderator: Baseball Moderators

The Road From Bristol

Postby Pogotheostrich » Fri Jul 22, 2005 9:30 am

This is great. :-D
Our task is simple: to determine, via a time-tested method (the 64-team elimination tournament as seen in the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament, which ESPN used to show in its pre-sucking days) which ESPN broadcasting personality is the most totally loathsome and most deserves to suffer permanent paralysis of the vocal cords.
Hall of Fame Hero
Hall of Fame Hero

User avatar
CafeholicFantasy ExpertCafe WriterMock(ing) DrafterEagle EyePick 3 Weekly WinnerLucky Ladders Weekly Winner
Posts: 21623
(Past Year: 224)
Joined: 9 Dec 2002
Home Cafe: Baseball
Location: St. Louis

Postby Mookie4ever » Fri Jul 22, 2005 10:12 am

Great, now half my morning is gone. Thanks. :-[

These were great ones:

Chris Berman (1) "I was rumbling, bumbling and stumbling to the finish line!!! I am Chris 'Aaron' Berrrrr-man and my legendary years here at ESPN date back to the dawn of man, when Vince Lombardi and Don Shula were strapping young college basketball players and Joe D & the Babe were catching touchdowns for Notre Dame. Anyway, I have sweated through ANOTHER shirt...does anyone have a towel for me to wipe off my belly & under my arms? I am burning up over here!"

1. Dick Vitale

The Crimes:

Is probably Satan.

. Chris Berman

The Crimes:

Inventor of stupid nicknames that amuse you if you are ten, or stoned.

Has been on ESPN since the dawn of time.

Suffers from premature senility, routinely forgetting where players play and what their names are.

Apparently gets his sportsjackets by beating up hobos.

ABC made him wear a toupee when doing MNF halftimes, but didn't make him wear a mask.

Occasionally broadcasts baseball even though he hasn't paid attention to the sport since 1985.

Anchors ESPN's interminable and constantly repeated Home Run Derby coverage.

Inventor of ESPN anchor self-promotion, so ultimately everything on this page is his fault.

Some other really funny ones. Crazy how much I like and hate those guys at the same time.
Head Moderator
Head Moderator

User avatar
ModeratorCafeholicFantasy ExpertCafe WriterMock(ing) DrafterEagle EyeCafe SpotterHockey ModBasketball ModFootball ModMatchup Meltdown ChampionPick 3 Weekly WinnerSweet 16 SurvivorLucky Ladders Weekly Winner
Posts: 19546
(Past Year: 138)
Joined: 17 Dec 2003
Home Cafe: Baseball
Location: Hakuna, Montana

Postby Madison » Fri Jul 22, 2005 10:40 pm

8-o Someone really put a lot of work into that. 8-o

Will make for interesting reading later, thanks! ;-D
Yes doctor, I am sick.
Sick of those who are spineless.
Sick of those who feel self-entitled.
Sick of those who are hypocrites.
Yes doctor, an army is forming.
Yes doctor, there will be a war.
Yes doctor, there will be blood.....
Mod in Retirement
Mod in Retirement

User avatar
ExecutiveEditorCafeholicFantasy ExpertCafe WriterCafe RankerMock(ing) DrafterEagle EyeCafe SpotterInnovative MemberCafe MusketeerPick 3 ChampionMatchup Meltdown SurvivorLucky Ladders Weekly Winner
Posts: 53856
(Past Year: 1)
Joined: 29 Apr 2003
Home Cafe: Baseball
Location: Taking Souls...

Postby perlick29 » Mon Jul 25, 2005 8:45 pm

Just wanted to bump this thread so I know where it is.
Forget the man crush. I drop what I'm doing to watch Zack Greinke pitch.
General Manager
General Manager

User avatar
EditorCafeholicCafe WriterEagle EyeCafe MusketeerCafecasterPick 3 Weekly WinnerSweet 16 SurvivorLucky Ladders Weekly Winner
Posts: 4810
Joined: 10 Mar 2004
Home Cafe: Baseball
Location: praising the almighty Baseball Prospectus

Postby raiders_umpire » Tue Jul 26, 2005 9:39 am

that was a nice read ;-D one of my favs was

Stu Scott is a mindless, characterless buffoon who endlessly repeats tired "urban" catchphrases for his corporate masters at Disney/ESPN. What's next, Stu? "Throw ya hands in tha air and wave 'em like ya just don't care"? What year is this?

User avatar
ModeratorCafeholicFantasy ExpertCafe WriterCafe RankerMock(ing) DrafterEagle EyeInnovative MemberCafe MusketeerPick 3 Weekly WinnerMatchup Meltdown SurvivorLucky Ladders Weekly Winner
Posts: 27781
Joined: 14 Dec 2003
Home Cafe: Baseball
Location: You will be missed, Robert Smeraldo.

Return to General Talk

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

Forums Articles & Tips Sleepers Rankings Leagues

Get Ready...
The 2015 MLB season starts in 14:51 hours
(and 24 days)

  • Article Submissions
  • Privacy Statement
  • Site Survey 
  • Contact