Top Ten Reasons Why Being a Dad is Harder Than Managing Your FBB Team:
10) All kids come with long-term guaranteed contracts.
9) One word: “Tuition”
8) Unlike most fantasy teams, you share the big decisions with a partner. You know, like the Yankees with their Tampa and New York offices. We know how smoothly that usually goes.
7) You don’t have to pay for your Fantasy player’s groceries, or jeans, or braces, or ipods, or …
6) Everyone needs to play everyday, there’s just no way around it.
5) “Hey dad? … Hey dad … Hey … dad … Dad? Dad! Daaaaaaad … Dad … Hey dad. Dad!!!!! … I’m hungry.”
4) Goldfish Funerals
3) When you’re a Dad, “Yakker” means something completely different
2) Your Fantasy Player will never ask you “Hey Dad … What does it mean when someone is gay?”
1) Kids have notoriously bad plate discipline.