In the grand tradition of lobster claw vs. tentacle I bring you:
Centaur vs. Cyborg.
If you lost the lower half of your body, would you rather be fused to a horse like a Centaur or would you want to be attached to a machine with tank-like treads?
Well this is a tough question. If I chose horse, there wouldn't be any real difference, genitalwise. So that would be comforting. But at the same time, I'd have a tail.
If I chose cyborg, though, I could probably do the robot even better than now, if that is possible. Unfortunately, the price of oil is way up and I'd have to stay lubricated.
If I had the back half of a horse, my house would be filled with crap. Getting onto an elevator would also be a pain.
Yes, I was, uh... I was thinking about ordering the tape, the videotape... about the college girls and the... the wild... the wildness. They're going wild or something? Somebody told me... about going wild.
-Larry David
Although the Centaur has the advantage in the bedroom, I would rather take the ability to destroy and add missle launchers to my lower half to kill stupid people.