The official Paul Konerko breakout of your slump stew.....

[cincyreds]

We'll see if this works.

(picture a) black boiling pot of water bubbling over a blazing fire.

(Ingredients)

one of Konerko's bats to set his swing on fire
one baseball so that the hits will come in bunches
one basepad to increase chances of getting on base
one cleat to get his feet moving
1 cup of pine tar for a better grip on the bat
1 left stinky black left sock ( ) why? not sure, just put in there!
1 pair of panty hose( ) to increase his swager so that he can score at night
1 tube of red lipstick( ) so that he can get plenty of kisses from his lady, to boost his confidence level.
1 pair of pink panties( ) so that he feels sexy, also a confidence booster.
1 cup of baseball dirt to run on during his homerun trot
1 cup of white baseline chalk so that the balls will stay fair for those down the line homeruns
1 umpires jacket to call ball 4 when the count is 3-2 more often
1 drop of gasoline(careful now ) to flow through his veins to make him play out of his mind for the remainder of the season.
1 ounce of smelling salts to wake him up!

There. I will keep track of how he does after I post this thread beginning with tonights game.

For those like me who have Konerko and are really rooting for him to wake up, keep your fingers crossed and let's hope this works.

[Greenrider]

and for the rest of us who grabbed Huff instead of Konerko, just keep on ridin' down easy street

[j_d_mcnugent]

i think paul needs to start breathing through his eyelids.

[Dennis Moore]

How did he have 75 RBI at the break last year? It's insane.

[cincyreds]

Ok. Maybe it takes a day or two for this to take effect.

He was a DH last night and only got 1 AB.

He is hitting a very low .206 now.

C'mon Paul! Wake up man!!

Snap out of it will you??

(Paul Konerko drinks potion)

Now tonight is the night that he will being to wake up.

[pilambp]

Does anyone still own this guy? Nows the time to dump him for good.

[yeszir]

and for the rest of us who grabbed Huff instead of Konerko, just keep on ridin' down easy street

I dropped konerko, and then i dropped huff. Its like a win/lose situation there for me. I feel so stupid after dropping huff, because i had him in such high regard when i drafted him, but then he struggled and i lose patience. Lets hope the konerko drop doesnt come back to bite me.

[tjhksig]

I have such little regard for Konerko, that I dropped him to pick up a bench OF. Konerko was my backup 1B, so to get Torii Hunter for him was easy. At least his stats look nicer on my team page. Plus, there were 5 1B that I think will have better year's than him on the WW (Young, Wilkderson, yadda yadda)

[cincyreds]

Okay gentlemen....we shall see, we shall see!

He is going to breakout....mark my words my fellow cafe friends.

He drank the stew potion and he is primed for tonight and for the rest of the season.

C'mon Paul!! I have not given up on you my friend!

[tjhksig]

Hope is the hotter sister of desperation, I think you're dating the ugly one.