Late-Night Jokes About the Baseball Steroids Scandal
"Congress investigating steroids. It's kind of ironic, isn't it?
Ted Kennedy asking somebody how their head got so big." —Jay Leno
"Congress today conducted an under cover investigation of steroids in baseball. Their conclusion -- the Chicago Cubs are just months away from getting nuclear weapons." --Craig Ferguson
"There's a congressional committee now investigating steroid use in Major League Baseball and so far they have subpoenaed a bunch of folks to testify about the use of steroids -- Jason Giambi, subpoenaed; Sammy Sosa, subpoenaed; Curt Schilling, subpoenaed; Janet Reno, subpoenaed." --David Letterman
"Congress is asking baseball players to testify about steroids. Asked about the steroid problem President Bush said 'I just use a little preparation H.'" --Craig Ferguson